Hell, Revisited

I have once before referred to Guatemala as "hell" for those with Type-A personalities. After a week of having my own Type-A buttons not just pushed but jammed, it's clear that I was right. However, I feel that things are starting to happen in me that just may end up changing the type of person I am.
Last week I hosted a large and "complex" team here from San Antonio, TX. By complex I mean 2 eye surgeons (they performed around 35 cataract surgeries), 4 doctors (they saw 500 patients), 1 dentist (100 patients - around 200 teeth pulled), and a vision group (200 patients with new glasses). To say I was in hyper Type-A controlling mode would be an understatement (I was even scaring myself!)
One morning before I left with the team for Cunen (about 4 hours north of here), I woke up, and realizing that something in me needed to change, said a very simple prayer: "God, please remind me that I...am...not...in...control." Although I don't want this to be true, I now recognize that it is. I am not in control. And it's time to start being okay with it. I've been reminding myself of this very simple truth every morning since, and to be honest, I think there may be something to it.
Here's what I mean: my job is basically to help keep the teams safe, happy, and busy while they're here. The most important aspect of my work is to ensure that those with a need (surgical, dental, medical, or vision need) get hooked-up with our doctors while they're in the area. So, of course the worst thing that can happen, after months of advertising in rural areas that American doctors will be in town on a certain day, is that no patients show up. When this happens, manic Jay comes out to play.
Well, this happened. We show up to a town called Los Trigales with 2 doctors and a dentist ready to do some great work, and there is literally not one patient there. I instantly feel every team member's eyes on me, thinking, "I just spent how much money to come to Guatemala to visit a desolate rural community?" I freak. But then remember my stupid little morning prayer, "Jay, you are not in control," and start saying it to myself. See what I mean by "hell?"
Faith, Revisited
So we're all sitting there in our gringo-mobile, at a desolate rural community in the middle of nowhere, staring at each other (mostly at me, wandering, "now what, leader-boy?") And then one of our doctors says something I'll never forget. He says, "I can't wait to see what God does next." What!? This dude (a dude with Harvard education, by the way) and I couldn't be more different. He must be like, Type-Z personality. And apparently, he's the master of this "I am not in control" thing.
This is him (the smart dude) pointing at numbers with our vision team at a clinic. Oh by the way, we ended up leaving Los Trigales after waiting 45 minutes for patients to show up and went to a town named Chiul for what turned out to be a great day (with tons of patients). Later that night, the doc pulled me aside and said, "No offense, but I sure am glad that we ended up following God's plan and not Jay's plan."
Now I'm not really on-board with those who believe that "everything happens for a reason," but there just might be a reason why it's not very healthy (mentally or spiritally) to continue trying to force our own plan and control every situation in life. Instead, what if I learned, like the wise Harvard doc, to just do my best in every situation and kinow with full confidence that "I am not in control...and I sure can't wait to see what God ends up doing next."

This is Bob. He's the man. I worked with him and his wife Barbara all week as their translator. I hope I heard all the patients right when they told me which tooth they wanted pulled. Oh well, having one less tooth never hurt anyone, right?

Peace to you,
Jay

Deep Thoughts by Carey Cooper

Guat happens.

Yes, I'm thinking of another four-letter word, but it's probably not appropriate for the director of the Susanna Wesley Preschool to use that word. I'm pretty sure Susie wouldn't approve. :) So, Guat happens. And it covered our school playground/clinic waiting room the first week of school. I won't pretend to understand our septic system and can only say that it wasn't sufficient for 24 preschoolers who use the bathroom...well...a LOT. And so, we were forced to close the school eight days after we opened and have been scrambling to find a solution ever since (all while hosting two volunteer medical teams from the States). Again, I won't pretend to understand what's being done, but I'm pretty sure it involves digging a very big hole until $7,000 can be raised for a new system.

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers this week. We're reopening the school (Tuesday/Thursday only for now), and I really hope I won't be telling the students, parents, and teachers that we have to close the school again.

Yes, Guat happens. But it sure seems to happen over and over again to the people of Guatemala.

The Honeymoon is Over

They warned us this would happen. One of the final stages of culture shock, the one right before acceptance, is rejection. I am so there. We're 4 months into our mission here in Guatemala and I find myself in the proverbial valley.
- Things I once found exotic are now just annoying or weird.
- The Moshito I eat on most morning is starting to taste like part of its name.
- The original relief I felt upon realizing that I wouldn't be sweating 24/7 while living here has been replaced by the harsh reality that it is just really, really cold here (how is it possible to feel colder inside a building than outside one!?)
- I find myself humming the tune "It's a hard-knock life" from Annie more and more (Note: Yes, I recognize how strange it is for a grown man with a receeding hair-line to be projecting his life onto that of a young, orphan girl with a red afro.)
- I'm secretly angry at Carey for somehow managing to escape meeting my new pet friend, the amoeba.
- Eating home-made Guatemalan food is no longer a life-enhancing, cultural experience. It just brings lots and lots of pain (especially the ones that start with "Ch-," such as Chicharrones, Churrascos, or Chuchitos.)
- I've become more fearful of water than the Wicked Witch of the West in Oz.
- Is it wrong to put an elderly Mayan woman in a head-lock if she persists on trying to sell me a rubber chicken on a string? (I promise I haven't done this...yet)

On the bright side, I find it somewhat comforting that I'm so predictable that I seem to be following the expected order of the stages of culture shock. I've got one prayer right now: "C'mon Acceptance Stage!" Oh, actually two: "...and protect me from the evils of the Chicharrone!"
Paz,
Jay

Susanna Wesley Preschool, Camanchaj

Yesterday was our first day of school, and it was so much fun! We started our day with a warm breakfast of scrambled eggs, black beans, tortillas, and oranges made by the Salud y Paz Amigas. Afterwards, Seño Mary (one of our teachers) helped us brush our teeth, and this took quite some time because we have 24 students and one sink! Next, we had morning circle, where we sang songs and learned that the day is Monday, February 2nd. We also looked outside to check the weather and decided that it was a sunny day in Camanchaj. Then we played a game to learn everyone’s names and even got to draw a picture of a new friend. After snack, Seño Josephina (our other teacher) read us a story about school and asked us lots of questions along the way. Next, we talked about the rules of our classroom and then played outside with our teachers. After a delicious lunch of spaghetti, green beans, tortillas, and milk, we brushed our teeth, and then Seño Mary told us a story about her first day of school. We were really tired by then and glad that it was time to go home. But we couldn't wait to come back tomorrow!

Morning Circle with our teachers

Shelvin, the doctor, taking care of a "sick baby"

Karenlin and Jhoselyne

Astrid


Story Time

Brushing our teeth after lunch